My form moving, accepting weight of…water or breath
It’s all in my head; most things are,
or at least they come to me in that way
My eyes, my fingers, eye contact
Touch, breath
Dreamsleep, doesn’t matter which side
I had really forgotten this feeling existed
I doubted that it did ever, at all
Everything feels heavier
Softer or
Harder oh
God I remember this feeling
She was her/me
Where did you go? Where have you been?
Who was I this whole time?
Everything can suddenly have this rhythm,
it’s unfair to have taken this away from me
Being alive, the beingness of being alive tickles
My skin
Maybe that’s why I have so many freckles
My hair changes color in the sun, like my skin
I can see inside your leaves
Let me water you
Just believe me I know this is what I am supposed to do
I can feel it
I know
I can feel it
That’s why I can’t sleep
It’s too exciting, I could stare into nothing
And I could talk forever
I would say everything ….but it still wouldn’t make sense, maybe
So that’s why I would paint
That’s why I paint
Yet still it doesn’t make perfect sense the way it does without me ever having tried to explain it in the first place
So, I sing, and I harmonize with this old guitar
And my feet, hardened on the soles from years of barefooting.
Bleeding and scarred, but I like it that way,
When I wash them and my hands they become clean like that
The way that other people tell me is good but I don’t feel pure
Like when I put my hands into the earth, into the water,
My poor mother’s body, the water that I can see in her leaves
Leaves
If I kept walking, the way I think my legs would like to do
I would find you in the desert, waiting
Circling my dead flesh like a scavenging bird,
Dark feathers, patient and hungry
Wings flap, heart flutter, wolf cry why
Did I ever leave this?
I don’t want to leave this
But I’m already on my way back
Because someone else was telling me this isn’t a productive place to be
But I guess I could stay here forever
Let me just dive as deep as I can if I never return
Know there’s no other place I should be
